This one time, I was on a train… 

I’ve never been too bad at navigating my way around the railway system in the UK, I’ve always been quite partial to jumping on a train at Portsmouth Harbour and sloping off for the weekend. My dad also works for train lines meaning, I knew all the do’s & dont’s and I’m sure he added a few more in under the over protective parents act of 2011 when I flew the nest to live in Brighton. 

So, Last Friday I managed to bag myself a spot on a group assessment day for a job I actually wanted *holds for applause*. This assessment day however meant having to pick myself up off of my Little Rock and travel for 5+ hours to… Luton? Hooray – a fun day out but also boo – are you freaking kidding me I have to go that far and might get cut at half time and THE STRESS?! I decided to share with you my day in a time line/play by play style thang because why not? And at the moment ‘the life and times of jasmine jervis’ is fairly boring and full of This Morning and Dinner Date (ta ITV).

Friday 24th Feb: 

4am- IM AWAKE AT 4am?! Im awake at 4am watching the news and wearing a full face of makeup by 4:15, Christ.

4:30- by 4:30 I’ve realised there isn’t enough tea, I have nil toothpaste and my nose ring has fallen out in the bed somewhere, such a Jazz start to the day..

4:45- and I have to call a cab. Sh*t. I’ve always been alright at making my own appointments etc but for some reason calling cabs in cities I don’t know worries me, are they going to turn up?! Do they work like every other cab company? Yes they will and yes they do. 

5:32- TRAIN JOURNEY NUMERO UNO.

7:12- my train is late into btown, no coffee, no Percy pigs, no surprise.

By 10am I’m in Luton and I’m shattered! I flew out of the station after realising I was going to be late, I jumped the taxi queue, sorry, and felt like Bridget when she needed to go and see Mark Darcey demanding the cab to stop and being her sassy assertive self telling the driver her destination. When it 100% just looked like a flustered girl trying to adult with one thousand (3) bags and a red face.

I’m not going to indulge you with details on the interview. But it did go really well, amazingly fun day, got through all the stages and was told I’d know if the job was mine in 1-5 days… #muchexcite.

TRAIN JOURNEY NUMERO DUO. 

4:59- I’m feeling so fantastic in my first class carriage (yes I had a 1st class ticket and I was not aware until now) after a top notch interview, it’s sunny, I’ve finally got a coffee and I’m on my way home when suddenly, it’s 5pm. I’m at City Thameslink station and it’s rush hour, but it’s okay because I’ve paid for my 1st class ticket and I’m all comfy and seated. I’ve gone a few stops from Luton and the train guard says over the tannoy ‘1st class is now declassified’ oh fab, I didn’t get to make the most of it AT ALL. So everyone piles into first class and we have; 

The looker, you know the slightly elderly lady who just looks at ANYONE who makes a noise, saying something would be far too embarrassing but she’ll look at you disapprovingly anyway because she couldn’t possibly read her book while you sneeze! She looked like Jennifer Paterson from the cooking show two fat ladies, I would’ve snapped her but I’m definitely not discreet enough. I’d also have attached a photo of Jen herself but I’m still a blogging novice. 

Next we had the huffer, the man in the lovely tailored suit with his newspaper and his Rolex, huffing every time someone else tried to squeeze themselves into the nightmarish box that used to be 1st class. Maybe he was feeling the anger of declassified seats? 

Mr Huff quickly brings me to headphone fiend. The kid who blares out Jonas Blue and Bieber into their ears but also ends up sharing it with the rest of the carriage. Mr Huff and Jen weren’t happy with him but he was blissfully unaware. 

Lastly we have the unsolved case of the Bluetooth ear plugs. This guy attempted to sync his ear plugs to his phone and instead, continuously kept playing the first line of ‘Friday I’m in love’, not that I’m complaining of his good music taste but eventually he got bullied by Looky McGee’s gaze too much and he slowly put his ear plugs back in his bag and went for a snooze. 

It’s 9pm and I’ve hit back in Portsmouth where I floated onto my ferry, into my pals car and was driven home to my perfectly made bed which felt like heaven, a cup of tea and Harry Potter, what a brit. 

But hey, that’s that I guess. My next blog should be a little less me and a little more blogster? Is that a thing? 

*p.s I got the job, pleased to say I’ll be joining the TUI team as a holiday rep for the next 6 months abroad and I hope to stay in the company long after. Hip hop hooray.

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